Understanding the Fight, Flight, Freeze, and Fawn Responses: How Trauma Shows Up in Your Body

Ever feel like your body has its own “emergency mode” that kicks in for no good reason? Maybe your heart races when your boss emails you, or you suddenly can’t move when someone confronts you. Welcome to the world of fight, flight, freeze, and fawn—the body’s built-in survival toolkit. These responses are your nervous system’s way of saying: “Hey, something’s off. Let’s survive this thing!”

Let’s break them down—so you can recognize what’s happening in your own body (and maybe stop blaming yourself for overreacting at family dinners).

1. Fight: The “I’ve Got This” Response

Your fight response is all about standing your ground. When triggered, your body gears up to defend itself—heart racing, adrenaline surging, and sometimes… yelling at your neighbor for stealing your parking spot (we’ve all been there).

Signs you might be in fight mode:

• Irritability or sudden anger

• Feeling “wired” or restless

• Wanting to argue or prove a point

• Clenched jaw or fists

How therapy helps:
In therapy, you can learn how to recognize when your nervous system is in fight mode and channel that energy in safer, more controlled ways. EMDR can be particularly helpful for processing the experiences that keep your body on high alert—so you don’t end up punching your pillow every time someone cuts you off in traffic.

2. Flight: The “Run Away, Fast” Response

Flight is your body’s built-in escape plan. Think of the last time you avoided a confrontation by disappearing into the nearest coffee shop or scrolling your phone until the world felt less threatening. Your nervous system is basically saying: “Not today, danger. I’m out.”

Signs you might be in flight mode:

• Wanting to leave stressful situations immediately

• Overplanning escapes or distractions

• Anxiety or restlessness

How therapy helps:
Therapy can help you feel safer in the present, so your body doesn’t automatically hit the “run” button. EMDR helps reprocess past events that trigger flight, teaching your nervous system: “Hey, we’re safe now!”

3. Freeze: The “Deer in Headlights” Response

Ever been in a situation where you wanted to speak up—or move—but your body said “nah, we’re just gonna… not”? That’s freeze. Your nervous system shuts down temporarily when it can’t fight or flee, like a glitchy robot trying to process danger.

Signs you might be in freeze mode:

• Feeling stuck or numb

• Trouble making decisions

• Avoiding confrontation or emotions

How therapy helps:
In therapy, you can gently “unfreeze” these stuck moments. EMDR can help your body safely revisit and process those paralyzing moments, so the freeze response becomes less automatic—and less exhausting.

4. Fawn: The “People-Pleaser Survival Mode”

The fawn response is the sneaky one. Instead of fighting, fleeing, or freezing, you try to please or appease the perceived threat. You might say yes when you want to say no or constantly worry about upsetting others—basically becoming a human doormat to survive.

Signs you might be in fawn mode:

• Difficulty setting boundaries

• People-pleasing or over-apologizing

• Feeling responsible for others’ emotions

How therapy helps:
Through therapy, you can start noticing patterns and learning to prioritize your own safety and needs. EMDR can help you process past experiences that trained your nervous system to fawn, making it easier to stand in your truth without guilt.

The Good News

Your body isn’t broken—it’s brilliantly designed to survive. Fight, flight, freeze, and fawn are all normal reactions to trauma or overwhelming stress. The tricky part is when these responses start showing up long after the danger is gone—like reacting to a mild critique as if it’s a bear attack.

Therapy, including EMDR, helps you retrain your nervous system so these responses happen less automatically. You learn to respond instead of react, creating space to feel safe, grounded, and yes… a little more human.

Takeaway

Next time your body goes into overdrive, remember: it’s trying to protect you. Naming your response—fight, flight, freeze, or fawn—can be the first step toward managing it. And if you want to go deeper, therapy and EMDR can help you process those old survival patterns, so you’re not running, freezing, or people-pleasing your way through life without even noticing.

Because trauma is serious—but healing doesn’t have to be grim. You can survive, you can laugh, and yes, your nervous system can finally relax… even if your cat still steals your spot on the couch.